Mom loneliness is a THING. It can even start before you are actually a mom with fertility struggles and loss. If you are struggling to get pregnant or dealing with loss right now, we feel you. We have been in your shoes. It can feel really isolating. You just want friends to be alongside you that can just literally mourn with you, and not try to fix your situation. We are so glad you are here…pregnancy sickness isolation! BEEN THERE!!!
Moms are meant to be so much more than just moms, and that is perfectly healthy and okay! If we invest in the things that bring us joy and happiness outside of motherhood we become a better wife, mom, friend, and everything in between.
Even for me, PODCASTS were a HUGE part of helping my mom loneliness- I would go for walks with the stroller, and just listen to a podcast. Even hearing another adults voice was helpful for me to not feel so isolated!
When you become a mom, your no’s to events will most likely increase a lot! forcing it. Finding those friends that even through the NO’s will still be your friends even with kids is so important.
Through the last year and a half- feeling really lonely and feeling like I literally had NO friends. All of my really close friends literally move away on me, and I wish I could transport myself to the other states to see them. God changed my heart in January and I had a new push to reach out to the friends I hadn’t been reaching out to that were still in town.
Breastfeeding as a new mom: pumping, latching issues, hot sweaty, painful, baby crying, embarrassing, have to be able to do this in public around other human beings in order to get out! No one will judge you, just take that leap of faith.
Connect with other mothers: YOU are not alone! You are not being unreasonable in feeling lonely. If you are longing for deeper friendships, or just time away for a little while you are not a bad mother!
How to battle mom loneliness. ADVICE: Invite the mom- compliment when you think of something nice. You make the initiative. Friendship IS NOT EASY. It takes work, and effort. It takes dedication. Work at it. Be consistent. Don’t get down if you are not surrounded by best friends ALL DAY LONG. Show up over and over again. Don’t try and be perfect, just be authentically you. Loneliness can feel “self focuses” …. I am lonely… I am sad……. Versus directing the attention outward…. The minute we stop focusing on ourselves….. we can try and encourage someone else and push out of our comfort zones!
Other action items:
Find your squad
Whatever you enjoy get out and do those things, even in moderation!